i tried so hard to keep the secret surprise for heather and i’s 17th month but she figured it out so keeping it secret felt pointless.
new music: The Big Time-Sick And Tired
Anthony Raneri – String Me Along
Silverstein – the last few songs on Addendum
what i’m currently hooked on: Motion City Soundtrack and Man Overboard.
fucking today. was way better than monday.
So on monday my co-worker Scotty decided it was appropriate to call me a bitch and say that i think i’m better than everyone.
i asked him “do you think you could ever work without having to go back to your house” because he does this like every time and he doesn’t tell me so it’s like… where the heck is he.he answered “you know you’re not so perfect yourself, you do shit you’re not supposed to”
i said “name it” i like hearing what other people have to say. i’m not one to ever shut someone out.
and he brought up something that happened like, over a year ago which i already got my punishment for and then also says i’m a bitch and i think i’m better than everyone.
very hurtful especially since it happened that the two witnesses didn’t care enough to defend me.. i wanted to cry honestly. it was unbelievable especially since i like Scotty, he actually does his job right and he takes his time to make sure he does. I’ve told him that and he even took my side when shit went down with Katelyn..
i was only being sarcastic when i asked him that question, it was truthful but i absolutely did not mean for him to take it like, i was fed up with it. but i might have. Katelyn and i actually began speaking after all this. i asked her what she thought i did wrong and she said it was the tone of how i asked it. which sounds familiar, i think i’ve gotten into MANY MANY conflicts over the way my tone of voice is compared to how i actually mean things.
but i texted Candy like i always do when i’m reaching low points and asked her if she thought i was a bitch or if i came off like i’m better than everyone. of course she doesn’t think i am. She told me that (she didn’t want to mention names, but i know she was talking of Katelyn, who was also one of the 2 witnesses) people have been saying i’m “being mean” but i discussed it with her and we BOTH agree – i am literally as offensive as a guinea pig.
Ryan, Scotty’s brother, who is also a co-worker was telling me Scotty had to have just been in a bad mood and i didn’t deserve what he said to me, but it is in fact Scotty, who can never admit when he’s wrong, or apologize to anyone. and Ryan told me a story of one time lol. so it brought me to an enlightenment of how true it really is – when someone is a bully or calling names or insulting someone to intentionally hurt them, those exact words that come out of their mouth, are ACTUALLY their very own insecurities. Scotty’s a little bitch who can’t admit he’s wrong because he thinks he’s better than everyone.
but today, today Scotty apologized to me. He said he was out of line and he was sorry. i apologized if my tone gave off the wrong setting, i know that happens sometimes and i told him he’s a great worker and i only meant to tease him.
But, seriously, this dude, apologized to me.
Ryan told me he never apologizes to him or his girlfriend
but HE DID TO ME.