jess really will always know how to break me. her choice of words just really fucking hurt, i don’t get how, maybe because they’re true? but it’s just unfair because she really made it seem like i’m abusive towards spike.
and actually, maybe that’s something i told caitlyn recently, how i feel like we have a problem with the animals and that it’s getting to the point that it’s abusive. it was on valentines day. because we’re not giving them the attention they deserve. even with the cats, i used to play with them so much. i’ve recently bought a new cat tower and new toys. to interact them more in hopes it will stop the spraying (it’s not just spike that pees around the apartment) but another problem i’m seeing is i also know spike isn’t the one shitting all the time either? i know i want to get more litter boxes, we have 7 cats now and 7 litter boxes BUT i don’t always get around to cleaning them daily, plus 2 of the 7 boxes are stupidly tiny (they were from an ex-roommate) i definitely want to invest in a couple of the bigger completely shielded ones.. because my jacky poo poo loves to kick litter around a lot but hey, at least he covers up the poop that the other cats just run away from after they’re done lol
so obviously at the end of the story we have stuff to work on. but it’s do-able as long as we’re determined.
5 of these 8 animals living here were really not what i wanted the responsibility of but obviously unless we find them homes, i’m going to have to learn to take some more tasks on.
it’s just hard, paying a hardcore majority of the bills (working 50 hour weeks just so i can fucking save money) and being responsible for so much and also trying to keep my living space clean
is this normal for 23? i mean i know over a handful of people my age that have KIDS now.
this is ridiculous. what happened to adolescence. just yesterday so many of us were mourning our friend jasmine who never even lived to be 23 and we were nostalgic of high school days. i feel like every february 20th will be our time of year where we all look back and remember.
part of me would do anything to go back to before my mom died at least but at the same time then i would never know caitlyn…
it’s sad, because no matter what age you are, you always think that things were easier when you were younger. 5 or 10 years from now i’ll look back at 23 and probably think i had it easy. i really hope my dad and (crazy) grandma are still alive 5-10 years from now..
alright i gotta pee out some natty ice bye