it really doesn’t make any sense to me
how she’ll say she wants to look at prices of studio apartments
and she’ll also say she’s afraid of living alone.

i’m afraid now, of living alone.
i wouldn’t have been able to afford rent without her help this month.
i’ve been on my own 7 years and i’ve only fallen into a hole.

my social life is tragic. my mental state is  …all how i make it.

writing is my number one distraction. staying focused on goals.

she’s talking to someone new
it makes me nervous because what if it becomes something..
i mean, no, me and her don’t have much progress to show.
but we’re no doubt, more affectionate than friends.
i don’t want a relationship any time soon,
and if i ever do, someone is going to have to show they actually want me.
that they care.that they can be trusted.
i just don’t think i’m worth it. i’ve got something wrong with me. i always come off angry. but i think i just suffer from anxiety.

i hit the enter button a lot for this post

consuming chocolate
and listening to flint eastwood
because its that emotional 1st day

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