ugh i just want to work on my writing but i can’t because i have to leave for work in 3 hours and i don’t want to get started if i can only work 3 hours. that seems kinda dumb, like i should probably just work on the bits and pieces whenever i can, but for some reason i just feel like the quality of effort i put into it is so much more…. refined…. when i can actually spend time to delve into shit.
i can’t believe how difficult this shit actually is. it’s an easy concept, but the editing, fixing, and extra details i am wanting just do not stop. i think what makes it difficult maybe is the fact some of the stuff i am genuinely wanting to put in here was written years ago and i strongly question the necessity of some of it lol. i just want to improvise so much.. but this is not something that just can be done in 5 minutes. I HAVE TO DELVE INTO MY MIND, BODY AND SOUL FOR SOMETHING THAT MAY OR MAY NOT BE THERE. BUT IF I FIND ANYTHING AT ALL, I NEED THE TIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEEEE TO EMBRACE THAT SHIT. it’s difficult.
god i just want to spend hours and days on this. i really find it necessary to take a vacation from both jobs just to dive into this. maybe i should research some advice/opinions from other authors from their first books.
i finally feel like i can do this. it’s just obtaining the time… i have off all day sunday.
FUCK IT. i just googled some advice. i need to do what i can. rtfn